Signs of Burnout Are Sneaky

At 31 years old, I went to the ER. I had fainted earlier that morning after flying across the country to see my family and celebrate my nephew’s first birthday. I was told that the crushing pain in my head, jaw, and eye was from shingles. I was also told that I had fainted likely because my body could no longer handle the pain.

I could barely open my eyes, it hurt to talk, and all I wanted to do was sleep.

I had allowed the stress from my work to hospitalize me.

I proceeded to spend the next 6 days in my completely dark room, bedridden, without even being able to look at the light of my phone screen. My boyfriend had to bring me small bites of food and sit with me as I painstakingly nibbled on plain toast and mashed up bananas.

This is not the version of “thriving” that I had in mind for my early 30s.

I’m sharing this not for sympathy but for relatability. I understand what burnout smells like, looks like, sounds like, and feels like. I also know what it is to stoke the burnt kindling of burnout and pretend that the embers of energy are still burning.

The effects of burnout are real, and it took me a pretty serious situation to realize I had to change something. We shouldn’t wait that long to realize the signs and symptoms of something.

Here’s my hot take: endless hustle is not worth it.

It will not bring that promotion, the accolade, the pay raise, or anything else that the “just push through” attitude makes you believe. If it does, what will it cost?

What Are Signs of Burnout

How people experience burnout may look different, but there are some similarities. For me personally, it looked like physical and mental exhaustion. I lost my joy and motivation to do things that typically excited me.

According to the WHO, burnout is caused by chronic stress that leads to exhaustion, negativity and reduced efficiency. This can be hard to identify in yourself; for me, I know I masked a lot of things with my daily coffee.

You might start to experience a some of these examples:

• Emotional exhaustion – it’s hard to think about how you feel, or how others might be feeling.
• Detachment from work – you don’t really care what happens next, or you procrastinate more than usual.
• Feeling ineffective and lack of accomplishment – you’re not excited by much anymore and can’t find the energy to go do your normal activities.

If you’ve ever experienced this, you know that it’s not fleeting. You also know that you don’t wake up one day and realize that you’re burnt out. It’s much more sneaky. It seeps in like the leak from under the kitchen sink, it lingers, and it grows until you realize you have a flooded kitchen.

The good news is that you are not the first, nor the last, to experience this.

In APA’s 2021 Work and Well-being Survey of 1,501 U.S. adult workers,

• 36% reported cognitive weariness
• 32% reported emotional exhaustion
• 44% reported physical fatigue (a 38% increase since 2019)

Great, we’re not alone. But, why does it even happen?!

Why Is Burnout a Thing & The Causes of Burnout

This is something everyone likes to know. There are a lot of reasons, and many times, this is personal. A 2021 study found 44% of women reported physical fatigue from burnout, a 38% increase since 2019.

If you’re like me (at least during the time of the story from earlier), it’s because your work is misaligned with what energizes you. Work-related burnout is so real, and there is no shame in recognizing that. This matters for many because the average working adult will spend 1/3 of their life at work.

Said another way, if you spend 1/3 of your time doing something that does not energize you, no wonder you feel tired and stressed out all the time.

It’s not because you’re not ambitious, not creative, or not smart enough. It’s because what you’re working on isn’t aligned with any of those things for you.

Let me say it plainly: you’re constantly exhausted from doing things that exhaust you.

Easy to say, harder to solve. Especially if you’re low on energy.

To get more specific, this prolonged stress, or burnout, could be caused by:

• Lack of control / autonomy
• Lack of clarity / support
• Unmanageable workload

I think it’s easy to point to work environments because burnout is typically talked about from that perspective. There are a lot of other types of burnout, outside of work, and I want to acknowledge that. Caregiver burnout, work or home demands, parental burnout, and the list goes on. Don’t be discouraged – acknowledging where you’re at is a really important first step to moving past it!

It can happen at work and seep into your personal life, or vice versa. It does not stay compartmentalized, at least not forever.

The Impact of Job (or any) Burnout

I didn’t think burnout was a big deal, and I thought I could just push through it. Positive thinking, hustle culture, and go above and beyond, right? No. Nope.

There are some pretty serious impacts from this. Your body has a variety of responses it will ‘turn on’ to protect itself. It also tries to get you to change something so it doesn’t have to work so hard all the time. (Personally, I experienced all of the below symptoms, and more, before I learned I had shingles).

Commons signs can look like this:

• Fatigue
• Apathy
• Tension Headaches
• Change in Sleep / Diet

This list is not exhaustive, and these symptoms are common. This is partially why burnout gets overlooked. You know yourself and your body the best. You know when something has changed or when something isn’t right. It’s not because your body is playing tricks on you – it’s because it’s trying to get you to listen.

Let’s dive into three areas you can start with to tackle this thing and move beyond it!

ABCs to Deal With Burnout

There’s a lot of techniques out there that help you navigate this in different areas of your  life. Things like mindfulness, clarifying a sense of purpose, making sure you’re getting enough sleep, and general self-care. The list goes on. Try the below steps, and keep it simple. It helped me, and I think it can help you too. You just have to be willing to try.

1. Acknowledge – Stop and accept where you’re at with your stress.

   If you don’t start with this, you won’t get very far. You’ll keep pushing until your body will force you to stop. Plain and simple.

2. Boundaries – Set them.

   Decide what is a healthy way to spend your time and how much you can manage at work and in life. Work-life balance is real! Then, figure out the steps you need to take to get to your ideal state. Start with one area, and practice there first. The whole point is to make real progress, not add more stress by having to manage more things. Reduce stressors, no need to add them.

   If you’re reading this, and you’re saying “yeah but” or “I can’t because” – notice how you started with excuses. There might be some things in life you just can’t change right now. Focus on what you can change, and start with small steps there.

3. Care – For yourself.

   This is a basic responsibility we all have in this life, so just do it. It’s your responsibility to feed yourself, clothe yourself, and get yourself up in the morning. Start thinking about the things that fill you with energy and joy. When are you the happiest?

   It can be big things or even small things. Start small, and start with only one thing to avoid adding more stress. Think about how you can incorporate it into a regular schedule. If you’re saying you can’t because you work really long hours or something, refer back to “B”, or point #2.

   Practical Tip: Write down these ABCs for your week, or even start with a day. Put it somewhere you will see it every day. Interact with it by adding a checkmark for each day you do these things. Give yourself a reward when you accomplish it – you deserve it.

Striking Balance in Your Life

But really, don’t let this be just another article you read. Let it be a line in the sand moment for you. Audit your physical and mental wellbeing. Ask yourself if you’re experiencing any of these symptoms, and dig into what might be causing them.

Work through the ABCs for one area to practice acknowledging the truth of how you’re doing, setting healthy boundaries, and taking care of yourself.

Your future self, your current loved ones, and friends will all thank you. We get one life, and time is a non-renewable resource. Start taking steps with the ABCs I shared above to get over burnout, reduce the stress in your life, and start loving the gift of the life you have. I didn’t say it would be easy, but many things worth doing are challenging. This is one of them.

You got this!